Things To Do

* Either have an eye job or go to Hawaii.  To do both would be too greedy? maybe not.  Maybe have the eye job & then go to Hawaii.  Then everyone will think my suddenly youthful appearance is from the vacation

*SELL THIS HOUSE

* Try convincing people to STOP using the chains on the ceiling fans! That's what the remote control &/or wall switch is for.  I'm sick of guessing why the lights don't come on when I press the button on the remote. I swear I'm going to climb up on the table & cut the chains off. That'll teach them.

*Find the cure for Dementia

* Stop letting people upset me, just ignore them.  I have this overwhelming urge though to engage anyone who irritates me.

*Somehow skip the next 4 years without anyone getting any older. (You know why)

*As alternative to last entry: A bolt of lightening strikes DJT & he isn't hurt at all, Instead he will suddenly become smart & compassionate ( and truthful).

* become a computer genius so that everything is not such a challenge.

*Lose 20 lbs overnight

*go zip lining

* overcome my deficits at learning a foreign language & parking a car.

* have dinner with Ina Garten, Martha Stewart, the notorious RBG, Jane Goodall, Elizabeth Warren, Gloria Steinem, Al Franken, Cory Booker, Rachel Maddow , Jaques Pepin, Ana Navaro, Armistead Maupin, David Sedaris, Joy Reid, Charlie Sykes, Charlie Kaufman, Mel Brooks and the entire staff of the New Yorker magazine.

* add names to above list as they occur to me.  I will be so embarrassed about the people I forgot the first time.

*come to terms with the fact that I no longer have my finger on the pulse of pop culture.

*Go see Broadway musical HAMILTON

*ride on one of those sail boats that have hammocks that hang over the water.

*find a time machine & tell myself to major in art history, not Speech Pathology

*Actually, find a time machine & tell myself a lot of things not to do!

*Become as funny as Andy Borowitz and Calvin Trillian

*Open a Kosher Dairy restaurant & serve things like cauliflower soup and pasta putanesca. I wouldn't have to work hard, it could be like a restaurant on TV where the owner just stays front of house & talks to patrons.

*get blocked on Twitter by DJT

*I don't want to own a gun, I just want to go to a shooting range & get a lesson. Strange coming from a pacifist.

*Actually go to a Yoga, Tai Chi, meditation class & stop talking about it.

*not kill an orchid

*be known as that cool old lady with the strangely youthful eyes whose place is fun to hang out at.