Boss In Training

Care giving for my mom has been a continuous learning experience.  I cherish every moment we have & everything I'm able to help her with.  She says " I don't want to be a burden to you." I tell her she is not a burden.  It is my honor to be able to help her now.

One thing I did not bargain on was being someone's boss.  I did everything here by myself until I couldn't do it anymore then I hired some caregivers to help me. I have made mistakes.  I mentioned at least one of them in a previous post "I have to leave at three o'clock".  I have made friends with some of the caregivers.  Not recommended.  There needs to be some respect for each other's roles & mutual recognition of the employer/employee relationship which is negated if you become "friends".  I waited too long to replace two caregivers who were not working out.  I kept thinking I would awaken one day & the two of them would suddenly discover all on their own that their performance was lacking. I had too much faith in being "lucky" rather than in directing their work.  On the other hand, I did post a short list of things to do each day on my mom's bathroom mirror.  I appear to have been the only one who read it.  There was one employee who thought she was directing my work.  I let that drag on way too long.  She thought it was appropriate work place behavior to roll her eyes, leave the room in a huff & then give me the silent treatment. Her explanation for this adolescent behavior was that I must not trust her if I kept "interfering".  What can I say to that? Thank you very much for your help & good luck in the future.

One employee pushed me to cut out a list of 10 questions to ask a home care agency about how they select their caregivers. The irony is that she is the one who caused the most problems.  Someday when I write my book, I will go into details, but the problems included fraud, alcoholism & possible theft of some of my mom's anti anxiety medications.

I resolve: I will stop making friends with the caregivers, I will keep our medications under lock & key,  I will not make them take a breathalyzer test before coming in the front door, but on the other hand maybe I should.